Woman cannot afford best friend's $3k+ destination wedding, friend attempts to guilt-trip her over her financial hardship: ‘[She] basically [said] I’m sorry you're poor in a condescending way’

Author image for Lana DeGaetano
Lana DeGaetano • "Show me to me please."
May 2, 2025 9:00 PM EDT

I've never understood destination weddings—at least, when a bride and groom think folks can shell out thousands of dollars on flights, accommodations, and the like at any point in their daily lives. Even if you give your guests years in advance to save for the occasion, some folks find it impossible to make ends meet as is while maintaining an emergency fund for themselves, and if applicable, their family. The bottom line is: Don't have a destination wedding if you want all of your guests to attend. It's hard enough for guests to buy wedding gifts that will wow the bride and groom without spending an arm and a leg, so putting a hefty fee on attending the wedding alone is absurd.

In this next story, a bride is guilt-tripping her friend, who cannot afford to attend her destination wedding, into finding a way to go anyway. Instead of respecting the woman's financial hardship, the bride decides to go full bridezilla and repeatedly shame her friend for being "poor". Hilariously enough, being "poor" does not equate to being unable to shell out $3k for a destination wedding—that's an absurd amount for anyone. Scroll below to read the full story.

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  • Cheezburger Image 10499525632
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    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • "I can’t afford my friends destination wedding and she is NOT taking it well. What else can I say to her so she doesn’t destroy our friendship?"

    What can I say tony friend when she is not taking this well? Please help me with wording I told my friend I cannot be her bridesmaid any more because I can't afford her wedding package. It is just under
    via HEY_McMuffin
  • $3K/person and I have a family of 4. I can't afford just for myself to go. And even if I did, it's a week before Christmas and my husband would have to take work off. So in the end we decided I
    via HEY_McMuffin
  • just cannot go. I told her gently and made sure she felt the love but a few weeks later she's LOST IT when I said I was to comic con. She said she is hurt that I am not prioritizing her wedding and not
    via HEY_McMuffin
  • saving money instead blowing money on mini family vacations. She told me how I should be handling my finances if I am in a financial pickle and how u should be saving, because that's how
    via HEY_McMuffin
  • she was able to attend her sisters wedding. After allot of back and forth (me being very understanding, sharing way too much about my finances and telling her I would go in a heart beat if I could make it work) she
    via HEY_McMuffin
  • completely ignored everything I said and is it very personality. And basically told me to not even come because I'd I do somehow make it financially work, it won't feel "genuine" But I feel her guilt
    via HEY_McMuffin
  • tripping isn't genuine, I think she just doesn't like that her ratio from groomsmen to bridesmaids isn't even. It looks like her fiances friends care for him more that her friends.
    via HEY_McMuffin
  • Cheezburger Image 10499525888
    via Blake Cheek For Unsplash+

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • My husband even privately texted her that it's about finances and that I am defeated I can't see her get married... she was soooo cold to him. And it's so unlike her. She talks and thinks like a therapist, I am shocked this is her reaction.
    via HEY_McMuffin
  • I just want to scream at her that she shouldn't have picked a destination wedding if I'm she NEEEEEDED everyone there.
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  • Tldr: she basically is saying that me not putting my life on hold with my family so be able to afford her wedding is showing how much our relationship means. How do I gently but firmly word it to her so she doesn't completely throw away 15 years of friendship?
    via HEY_McMuffin
  • Edit: oh and I forgot to mention, I threw her an engagement party because I was scared of not being able to go to the wedding, so made sure I did other bridesmaid duties to make her feel special and loved. I made sure to be at every event to celebrate her (even when her own sister didn't) Oh... but not the $1200 bachelorette week end
    via HEY_McMuffin
  • She half a ed an apology this morning - basically saying I'm sorry your poor in a condescending way. Even though ironically this is the richest we've ever been(and still just hovering above living in the red every month)
    via HEY_McMuffin
  • titanium_moose Honestly? With a reaction like that is she actually a decent friend? I'm not sure I would want to salvage a friendship with someone who behaved like that.
    via titanium_moose
  • Boredpanda31 It's ridiculous that she expects people to prioritise her wedding over their lives. 3k to attend a wedding is crazy!
    via Boredpanda31
  • Spiritual_Lemona... I mean how much do you want this friendship. Because I personally would be so done. She's expecting you to be friend while also not being a friend to you at all.
    via Spiritual_Lemonade
  • This is crazy amount of money to expect others to come up with. Doesn't she have an old grandmother or something who can't swing this either.
    via Spiritual_Lemonade
  • mebg1956 I really don't like destination weddings. Go to your exotic destination, maybe take immediate family, get married on the beach at sunset, and come back and have a party.
    via mebg1956

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Wedding Themes poor planning bride marriage entitlement wedding party wedding planning wedding drama bridesmaids marriage-drama wedding bridesmaid brides entitled planning weddings entitled people
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